2015 July 3: Where I died


Bottles were always popped
We club hoped all night
I was always high
High on weed
Drunk in love
Your love my weakness
The night was always young and we were

I spent my youth falling in love
with you.
With you I lived a thousand words
Ngakubiza nkondlo yami ebhalwe emzimbeni wami.
I lived a thousand years
whether ngingaphezulu or ngingaphansi kwakho
I thought my loving you was my life
but now when I am gone from this
I now know where I died
I remember.

You sang for me and took my breathe away.
I gave up life to live at your side
Your side made me alive until the day
I looked in the eyes of the monster.
The monster I loved.

“A lovers quarrel will strengthen the relationship”
You will say we are stronger today then we were yesterday.
Because yesterday I saw your weakness
I saw the vulnerability in your eyes.
When each fist I got.
Evoked a fire that rekindle a love so deep that I fell in love
I leave a thousand years
whether ngingaphezulu or ngingaphansi kwakho.
I thought I lived but what the love I thought was.
Was my grave.
I lived in my grave when I thought I lived a thousand years.
Ngingaphezu or ngingaphansi kwakho.
I chose to stay decorates with black and blue
coz a part of me believed.
I died every time I was black and blue.
I remember when I died
I died when I chose to love my abuser.


by Phila Mbanjwa

© 28/05/2015




Previous by Phila



2015 July 1: Accepting my calling






2013 March 10: “I love women and they love me”








This entry was posted in Another Approach Is Possible, Archived memories, Creating awareness, Expression, Power of the Voice, South Africa, We Are You, We Care, We Still Can with/out Resources, Writing is a Right and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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