I’m on the edge of the bed, I realise I haven’t uttered a word to you, I haven’t said goodnight, nor gave you a kiss. It’s been a long day for me, for you.
I begin to unfold the events of the day, the good ones and the bad ones.
I missed you, I longed for you, and I felt sadness shatter my collar bone, what could be wrong.
You see life is strange, with its fair share of confusion and misunderstandings; you try to see right from wrong, left and right, up and down, which way is good for me, which way is safe for me,for everyone.
I begin to think about what lies ahead, all that awaits me, all that is destined for me, could this really be the path I was born to follow, could this be the key to the happiness?
I wonder if I prepared for this journey, I wonder if its all worth it, but with life you never know. I see you resting so peacefully, your head is carefully placed on the pillow, how ironic, you’re not fond of pillows, but your exhaustion is beyond minding a pillow.
These are the moments when I truly see your beauty, the hidden smiles emerging from your sleep, I smile as well, the realisation, that you’re the only one who understands my tru nature, beyond anyone could ever imagine, the only one who understands my rage.
I turn to place to a blanket on you, it hits me, its not about our sexuality anymore, not about our cultures, our values, morals and ethics, family and friends, it is what is was meant to be; love, that’s all it ever was, love, and that is all it will ever be.
Hello, my name is Zandile, and I am in love with a woman.
About the author
Zandile is an Accounting student at University of Johanneburg.
She is an avid writer and a lover.