2013 Mar. 3: 7 Years on… the struggles continues

by Ntsiki Cassie Dlamini

In memory of Zoliswa Nkonyana (19), who was stoned to death in Khayelitsha in 2006.
_____________________

Your piercing stares

uncloth me

Whilst your nasty comments

dehumanize and humiliate me

Your laughs behind my back

drove me, drove me

drove me, deep, deep into

my own universe

A place, a friendly place

Where being different was okay

A place where souls

found each other

A place where I could be

genuinely happy

In this place meaningless

things such as

gender, sex organs or sexuality

didn’t matter.

Although in your universe

Although in your universe

I realised the starring

were piercing deeper

the comments

were harsher and

your laughs had gotten

even more louder

I turned a blind eye

that I was an outcast

So I kept to myself

with my head held low

to avoid drawing

more unnecessary attention

And yet at the age of 19

You felt you had

tolerated me enough

You tore me open with
your weapons and bare hands

I felt like I was drowning,

drowning 
in my own blood

no one cared to save me

Each beating, 
stabbing and rock than tore

my flesh open

I named them one by one

Activist, Feminist, Homosexual, Struggle

Acceptance, Justice, Power

and it was well with my soul

For you have given the

ones left behind the strength

to fight for me and themselves

I lay there after you

were done with me

to listen to my own life leave my body

Finally you have killed me

Not with your laughs

nor comments

neither your stares

But you killed me like

an animal with no feelings, 
no mercy

heartless and cold

Only because I am a lesbian

You didn’t understand me

You didn’t even

want to try

We will live on

for we were born to live

whether accepted by

you or not but

we will still live on

We will keep on fighting for our freedom

The struggle continues…

__________________________

About the author

Ntsiki Cassie Dlamini is a young beautiful South African proud lesbian woman, activist.
She’s from a small town, Pietermaritzburg. Studied Arts & Drama at University of KwaZulu Natal (UKZN).
In 2006, she volunteered at the Gay & Lesbian Network as a health counsellor, and facilitator.
She also participated in the Rainbow Theatre Company, a drama group that showcase the difficulties that same gender loving persons are facing on daily basis.
She is a writer and spend most of her spare time writing.

Her previous works:

2013 Feb. 16: My own perfect

2013 Feb. 11: I almost wished

This entry was posted in Activism, Archived memories, Arts, Black Lesbians, Black Lesbians & Allies Against Hate Crimes, Community, Crea(c)tive senses, Expression, Hate Crimes, Organizations, Performance, Poetry, Queer poetics, South Africa, Victims, Violence, Women; Voices; Writings; Education; Traditions; Struggles; Cultures. Bookmark the permalink.

5 Responses to 2013 Mar. 3: 7 Years on… the struggles continues

  1. Jongi says:

    Yes this is because we do not have proper police service but police force, that has never change with regime change, watch this video to witness https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=44X42wkWs2c
    Share and stop police brutality and killing among us.

  2. Lebogang says:

    Hi Matshidiso, I have read your poem and your blog. It takes a lot of courage for a young intelligent lady such as yourself to bring forth such cry and I respect that.

    I’m a “straight guy” and Lebogang is my name. As much as I know my so called kind have treated you and probably still treat you terrible. I plea with you and wanna tell you that your not alone on the fight for your rights to be treated as equals with other heterosexuals mainly because we are all beings. I sure do not expect you to be treated less compared to me or other man and woman out there simply because you have a different sexual desire.

    Your story is touching. Go on with your plans to making the noise. The road isn’t easy I understand but Continue voicing out even on twitter. You’ll be heard.
    God be with you all the way.

    Kind regards

    A friend. Malatjie-Mamabolo Lebogang

  3. Lady Thorns says:

    Damn…

    It takes a few to get me speechless and today sees you as one of them.

  4. Pingback: 2013 March 21: EPOC event report | inkanyiso.org

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