by: Thobeka Bhengu

For the past three years, I have been annoyingly passing remarks and suggestions to my close friends about them tying the knot and inviting me. I had never attended a queer wedding before Deborah “Dee” and Laetitia Dlamini’s exquisite wedding.

Dee                                                                  In the picture (From left): Dee Dlamini & Laetitia Dlamini saying their vows. 08 Dec.2018. Kempton Park.

On Saturday December 8 2018 we witnessed a celebration of queer love at In2 Africa- Function/Wedding and Conference Venue in Kempton Park, Ekurhuleni, where Dee and Laetitia held a wedding celebration of love and a beautiful union. During the wedding we watched, chuckled and shared a tear as Dee and Laetitia demonstrated their love with family and friends.


I had no particular expectations when I became aware that we were to shoot a lesbian wedding. I actually looked forward to it. I have always been a sucker for love and commitment. Some things start to change as you get older, you start to think of the future, you think of commitment, family and the works. But for some this might not be the case, they might want to travel, see the world, meet new people and chase their dreams.

There’s an intrinsic shift in perspective, knowing yourself and your insecurities as you get older and you search for that one person you can return home to, so they can rub your back, massage your feet and make you feel at home after a long hectic day. We are all not so lucky to find love instantly but we continue meeting new people, it works out for a while until it no longer works and you’re caught in petty drama or sometimes you find that one person who makes you feel safe, does all the right things and you would not mind choosing them every day.


When we arrived at the wedding venue in the morning both brides were still getting ready for their special day. Laetitia was in a slight panic about delays when her wife to be was running a little bit late and she was also still to get ready, get into her perfect fitting gorgeous dress, do her simple yet elegant makeup and finally get a hairstylist in to finish off the look with a short, elegant and slightly curled bob cut. When she got into her dress, her relative walked in which saw a beautiful emotional moment for Laetitia. These moments were constant throughout the ceremony. Moments that made you see the true beauty of love. The kindness and unity that true love brings. The speakers of the day also shared love, wisdom and witty jokes.


There is something magical about seeing people who love each other, from the long gazes, goofy smiles and the words that suggest they are in it for the long haul.  I have hardly celebrated queer unions, so for me nothing felt and seemed more natural than Dee and Laetitia’s union. It was the natural order of things, the way it should be; and the kind of wedding I would have liked to see when I was younger.


It puzzles me that people frown upon queer love, making it seem taboo and unnatural to those who are anti-homosexuals and anti-queerness+. Saturday was a magical day and we were pleased to support, witness and document one of our own Faces and Phases participant Dee Dlamini getting married to her beautiful wife. We congratulate you Dee and Laetitia Dlamini, may you keep choosing each other every day, even when some days may not be so peachy. May you find partners for life in each other and be patient with one another. We wish you all the best!


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