2014 Jan.30: Paraplegic’s bed

by Thuthula Sodumo

There are a few things in life that are comfortable and uncomfortable at the same time and a paraplegic’s bed is one of them.
It is comfortable because it is made with care with a “sickly” person in mind and God knows they need the comfort.
It is uncomfortable because it is the most unpredictable bed you’ll ever share with anyone.

Chances are honey you’d wake up with your eyes unable to open because of the stench of the urine of a fully grown ass woman.
Your mouth dehydrated and your nasals burning – yes urine does that, it is acidic remember?

Chances are you’d fall out of love that moment or you’d fall deeper in love because well what’s more embarrassing than waking up and your right side is soaking wet.
You have no fucking idea what happens.
The trauma and the shock, you feel it and you think…”heck no I didn’t pee it’s not me, then who?”
You check your partner and then voila you find the source of your misery or your comic relief.

Because really there are three ways to look at it and that is through laughter, anger or minimizing the situation by letting your paraplegic lover sleep and then deal with it later.  Of course this isn’t for everyone.  This isn’t for that woman who buys expensive silk for bed. This isn’t for that woman who’s never experienced that spontaneity of life, nor for the planner or the materialistic one.
This is for the gypsy hearted – ones whose sole purpose in life is seeking adventure in life.

You are busy fucking and as you are busy finger fucking and eating your paraplegic lover’s pussy, a gush of something watery comes out.
Ooohhhhhh yessss I’m good!”  you think and she says with anguish in her eyes, “I’m sorry I didn’t mean to. You wonder,” woman what you talking about I just made you cum” and she says…
“no I..I think its pee, I just peed”.

You think “not in hell I just made you squirt I’m good at this, baby I just made you cum in floods
Two things can happen here, you can stand up and freak out with you ego bruised and disgusted and again fall out of love or you can spend the entire time debating and licking and trying to distinguish the taste if its cum or urine either way it won’t matter cause you made something come out of her pussy and love her silly.

You could be in bed playing and you playfully get on top of her tickling the devil out of her and she screams for her catheter because by sitting on her and making her laugh that much for some reason made her want to pee.  She inserts the catheter maybe a little too late and wets herself then what?
Is the fun over or fuck this where were we babe?

See the aim or goal of this all is letting you know dating a paraplegic isn’t anything you can ever be ready for.  There is no school that will ever prepare you just like there’s no school to teach one how to love.
It is like a battle field of fun and frustration, all in one.
There are few things that would ever demoralize a paraplegic woman and one of them is acting like being with her is a duty, a job and some obligation.  Treating her as if she went and bought the disability is an insult. Whatever you do, prepare for adventure and some indecisiveness and maybe some of the most frustrating times but in all that be with her because it is where you want to be not out of pity or some twisted reality.  Enjoy her.

Bon appetite and be kind.  Always.

© 2013 Dec. 21




Previous by Sodumo


2013 Nov. 12: God, the lesbian, the sin



2013 Sept. 11: The touch



 2013 June 11: Double Trouble




2013 April 3: Reflecting on InterSexions




2013 April 4: Gender blind



This entry was posted in Accident, Black lesbians with disabilities, Creative writer, Dating, Discomfort, Eastern Cape, Family, Health, Hear Us Out, Homosexuality, Human rights, I can't do it ALONE, Identity, Insulted, Intellectualism, Knowledge, Lesbian Love Is Possible in South Africa, Life Stories, Living by example, Love, Politics of existence, Politics of geography, Politics of representation, Power of the Voice, Privilege, Queer visibility, Questioning, Readings, ReClaim Your Activism, Recognition, Reflection, Respect & Recognition from our community, Self acceptance, Sharing knowledge, South Africa, Speaking for ourselves, Survivor, Textualizing Our Own Lives, Urine, Visual Voices, We Are You, We Care, We Love Photography, We Still Can with/out Resources and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to 2014 Jan.30: Paraplegic’s bed

  1. Babazile says:

    Poignant illustration Love b’tween two different yet similar human beings hahaha lol i truly enjoyed it! Thokoza!

  2. Pingback: 2014 May 27: You’re a beauty | inkanyiso.org

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